Valentines Special: Will You Marry Me? And Other Questions

Questions. They are powerful things, aren’t they? They can change how you feel, from sad to happy, or they can change your life, like the question posed in the headline.

Questions use what we like to call ‘pull’ communication to bring out your answer, which is the most powerful answer because it comes from you. You own it. Top performance coaches use ‘pull’ communication to get the very best from people and use the directive ‘push’ communication very little.

Most people use ‘push’ communication to make a point, asserting their thoughts and ideas upon others, rather than using a question that makes their point for them, which would be much more powerful and influential upon others.

Consider the following scene: “My boss has upset me because he’s stupid and can’t see that we could save loads of time and money. I asked him to put Sat-Nav’s in our trucks and he turned me down.”

Why did the boss turn him down? Maybe he was approached at the wrong time. Perhaps he didn’t consider the proposal because there is no budget for such an expense. Perhaps he is already under pressure to keep costs screwed to the floor. Either way, telling the boss about your great idea won’t get you very far.

Another way would be to ask the boss some questions, like: “I know you’re busy, have you a moment to discuss an idea I have?” “Do you know how much we spend on fuel each month?” “Were you aware that our drivers get lost 2hours every day, looking for the correct address?” “How many complaints do we get every month from customers complaining that they got their delivery late?”

If the person has done their research into the answers, just in case the boss doesn’t know, then he is ready and open to any ideas you might have to ease the pain!

Questions can get you what you want, just make sure you ask the right questions at the right time, in the right way. You don’t have to wait until Valentine’s Day to ask.

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#communication #conflict #decisionmaking #coaching #ChangeManagement #confidence #emotionalintelligence #leadership

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